Why New York Will Always be Better for NASCAR Than Las Vegas
My buddy, Jeff Wolf of the Las Vegas Review-Journal, apparently didn’t like some of my comments in a column earlier this week as to why I have some misgivings about the NASCAR awards banquet moving to his fair city.
In his own inimitable fashion, Jeff good-naturedly let me have it (link is at the bottom of this column), and that’s fine. We’re long-time friends and enjoy each other’s writing. I respect his opinion.
But since Jeff threw down the gauntlet, and in the interest of fair play – I challenge him to beat this – I’ll respond with a Letterman top-10 style list of why New York has been, is and always will be a better choice for the NASCAR banquet than Sin City:
No. 10: In New York, NASCARians got to rub shoulders with some of the most elite folks in the business and entertainment worlds. In Las Vegas, NASCARians will be just another in a long list of folks with “sucker” written across their forehead.
No. 9: There was once a move in Las Vegas to put slot machines in bathroom stalls, right next to the toilet paper, to, shall we say, pass the time better. Even in its darkest financial days, NYC wouldn’t poop … uh, err, I mean … stoop that low.
No. 8: In New York, you don’t see signs for legalized brothels “just a convenient hour’s drive from here.”
No. 7: New York has Broadway and tremendous stars. Las Vegas, on the other hand, has more past-their-prime entertainers still performing per capita than anywhere else except maybe Branson, Mo. Vegas is where has-beens – and their careers – go to die.
No. 6: Name me one other major city in the country other than Las Vegas whose mayor’s first name is Oscar. Oscar? Is his chief of staff named Felix? I mean, come on, OSCAR?????
No. 5: New York sidewalks are packed with hard-working people. Las Vegas sidewalks are packed with guys passing out fliers for “XXX-rated entertainers, right to your hotel door.”
No. 4: New York is the safest big city in the U.S. Las Vegas still can’t figure out who shot Tupac.
No. 3: New York had the Chairman of the Board, the late, great Frank Sinatra. Las Vegas has Wayne Newton. ‘Nuff said.
No. 2: Las Vegas has a fake Statue of Liberty, Empire State Building and Brooklyn Bridge on the Strip. New York has the real McCoys. Top that, Sin City.
And the No. 1 reason why New York has been, is and always will be a better choice for the NASCAR banquet than Sin City: When you get into a cab in New York, the first question you’re asked is “Where to?” In Las Vegas, the first question you’re asked is, “Hey, you want to see some naked girls?”
(And, as promised, here’s Jeff’s column calling me out: )
Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on 11/13 at 05:00 AMWell Jerry you and Jeff are about 50—50 onthis one BUT there’s no place like home It’s gotta be in Charlotte or Daytona or it doesn’t matter, one is because the what in the world does NY have to do with racing or Las Vegas [truly ,forget the tracks i try to] Bring it on home to the true fans the NASCAR SOUTHERN BASE we make up most the true,loyal fans
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